Coming Soon to a Theater Near You
“The Hollywood Reporter says that DreamWorks is close to acquiring movie rights for View-Master, the vintage toy that offered simulated 3-D pictures through a pair of plastic binoculars.”
–New York Times, 7/7/09
TO: Stacey Snider, DreamWorks chairman
FROM: Bob in Development
Now that we’ve got “View-Master” on track, here are a few more ideas we’ve been batting around. We should be ready to announce these shortly:
“Slinky”: A boy discovers that his new toy, a springy coil of metal that mysteriously comes to life, is all he needs to become the greatest secret agent ever.
“Etch-A-Sketch”: After surviving a lighting strike, an inner-city girl finds that her toy can sketch the secret to cheap, efficient, renewable energy – if the evil oil companies don’t get to her first.
“Hello Kitty”: A boy and his dog are all that stand between America and certain destruction by an annihilating force of plush Japanese felines.
“Play-Doh”: His mother told him, “Don’t mix the colors.” But he didn’t understand why – until he did just that.
“Pick Up Sticks”: The fate of the world depends on one girl’s steady hands – but these oversized toothpicks have a mind of their own.
“Pixy Stix”: Straws full of fruit-flavored sugar – charmed by supernatural beings – could be the key to Glumville’s first football championship ever.
“Checkers”: A little dog saves Vice President Richard Nixon from having to resign from office – so he can take on Nikita Khruschev in a classic board game.
“Twinkies”: It looks like a nutrition-free snack cake. But one package just might hold the secret to eternal life – if the North Koreans don’t steal it first.
“Mr. Clean”: When Timmy unleashes a genie from a bottle of cleaning solution, he becomes the target of a certain Mr. Osama bin Laden.
“Tinkertoys”: A greedy land developer tries to stop a scheme that could provide affordable housing for all the world’s homeless.
“Cat’s Cradle”: A friendless nerd discovers that his talent with string might just win him the love of a local beauty queen – unless his heart gets tangled up in knots.
“Hopscotch”: A race against time comes down to a death-match involving chalk, rocks and a brutally uneven piece of sidewalk. Can Billy stay one jump ahead?
“Tic Tac Toe”: Lucy teachers her pet Siamese to master an ancient pastime so she can challenge a champion chicken. Did someone say, “Cat’s game”?
